This is not the full version of my spiritual transformation, but I have to put something here to follow up with the stray cat allegory. Here goes:
So, on July 27th 2009 God blessed me with a massive brain trauma and a craniotomy complete with titanium plates and screws, and then a couple months later he removed all my assets and all my people, left me and my school with nothing and nobody, but my love and vision for the children. Only God stayed close by me and revealed himself to me on that day when I came to look into the emptiness and morn the loss and think about the blame ia had fo rmyself. I expected to look inot a dark pit of self reproach and loathing, but instead I saw Gods loving hand, and God said, “Fer not, this has nothing to do with anything you did wrong. This was all partof the Plan! Everything is going according to plan. Fear not. Ive taken all the stumbling blocks out of your way, build it again! All the naysayers, doubters and haters are gone, build it again, but this time build it so that you are supported and sustained because without you, it cannot be. So I guess if you only get to have one person standing with you and helping you out, it’s a pretty good thing if he is omnipotent and Commander of the Universe. Do you know, He is really well connected, he knows everybody? And he knows who to bring in to help with whatever is needed and has arranged for them to show up at just the right time! Just like a play, people enter hte stage at a rprearranges time. Whenever somthing is needed to be done, just the right person shows up. So I feel a great peace with such a competant partner. And so all this had a Purpose: So that when it is all rebuilt people will realize it of God’s will and not of human hands, Because what is happening now is not humanely possible. The only possible explanation for this rebirth and expansion is Divine intervention. There is no way a single human being with all assets removed, all human, material and (worldly) support taken away, and half her brain tied behind her back could accomplish this Mission. Yet it is happening. I am doing nothing other than praying without ceasing..and letting God handle all of it, and He is so good at it! It is all God’s work, He is the best person Ive ever hired and He has accepted my soul as payment, in full. And I was happy to give it to him for safe keeping as I really wasn’t using it at the time anyway. There is no other explanation for what is happening. Every day brings yet another miracle! Thank You God!
A man plants the seed, a man waters the plant, but only God knows how to make it grow. And it only happens through his grace. And that is your proof, in case you were doubting. A couple months ago, when I got overwhelmed by the magnitude of the work needing to be done. God spoke to me, he said, “Remember how HARD it was for you to do YOUR job when people were doubting you and didnt have faith in you? (He loves to use parables from peoples lives to explain things, you know) and I said, “Yes!” and he said, “Well its like that for ME! I need your FAITH to do MY work! You think you have too many things to do. But really there is only ONE task that is required of you. You only need to do ONE thing: BELIEVE!”
“Ohhhhh! I get it!” I love how HE explains these things so that even I can understand. And this is one of many conversations Ive had with Him since He remodeled my brain adb added hte intercom so I cold hear Him. I guess getting close to death brought me close to God. But it was shown to me it was not my time to go. God still has a P:urpose for me here. He is the only one in charge of when people live and when they die nobody argues that point.
SO here I am, living in gratitude instead of being dead and six feet under the ground. Every day is a gift I shall not waste. I rejoice in every day. You should too!
And oh yeah, on July 27th 201o I was baptised! As though it were planned, butI did not plan that as I cannot manage time at all anymore since my surgery. I really feel my hospital journey was a spiritual training. I got curious and counted the days I was in the hospital exactly 40 days! From July 27th to Sept 4th.
I ill write and post the full story here sometime.